Couple Therapy: Why be more compassionate

Couple Therapy: Why be more compassionate

Couple Therapy: Why be more compassionate

The Dalai Lama says that compassion "belongs to that category of emotions that have a more developed cognitive component." Compassion is a mixture of empathy and reason. When we practice compassion, we will have more strength, peace and joy and this will transfer to all the people with whom we associate.

We can define compassion as a feeling of sadness that occurs when seeing someone suffer and that encourages them to alleviate their pain or suffering, to remedy it or to avoid it.

Compassion in cognitive behavioural therapy is also used as a resource to learn to manage our emotions and consolidate our personal growth.
Compassion is a behaviour aimed at eliminating suffering and producing well-being in those who suffer. It is essential to achieve calm and well-being and enhances our social relationships. Self-pity refers to how we behave with ourselves when things are not going well for us and has a therapeutic effect on shame and self-criticism.
Compassion plays a critical role in activating our neurological wellness system. Its therapeutic importance must be framed in that it is a process that helps to overcome the negative consequences of destructive self-criticism and shame in social relationships and that generates positive emotions that are very important to feel happy.
Recent studies by Dr Chris Hedges have shown that rich people (the rich) have much less compassion than the economically disadvantaged (the poor). a person. Your feelings of compassion and empathy decrease in your feelings of entitlement to deserve this and your ideology of self-interest increases. In reality, it is the wealthiest people who are most likely to moralize that greed is good. In that, the pursuit of self-interest is favourable and moral. We've done other studies that have found that wealthier people are more likely to lie in negotiations to support unethical behaviour at work. How to accept bribes by lying to customers. I don't mean to suggest that only rich people display behaviour with these patterns. I believe that all of us, in our day to day, minute by minute, struggle with these motivations in the competition of when or if to put our own interests before the interests of other people. But what we're discovering is that the richer you are, the more likely you are to pursue a personal success vision of achievement, to the detriment of those around you. We are at unprecedented levels of economic inequality. Economic inequality is something that should concern us all. There is a lot of really compelling research showing the variety of things that are undermined. Ask that economic inequality is getting worse. Social mobility. Social confidence in physical health declines as inequality increases. Similarly, things like violence. imprisonment, punishment, worsens as economic inequality increases. And if that's the case, we've found that the richer you are, the more entitled you feel to that wealth, and the more likely you are to prioritize your own interests over other people's interests. Well, then there is no reason to think that those patterns will change. This cascade of self-perpetuating negative effects can seem like something out of control. And there is nothing we can do about it. But we've been finding that little psychological intervention on child poverty that served as a reminder of the needs of others in the world around them.
The belief system is what we think about ourselves, about others, and about life. The entire set of beliefs is our personal paradigm.
Beliefs direct your thoughts and emotions, they can lead you to the fulfilment of a prophecy, either positively or negatively. They can block you and not allow you to achieve your goals and dreams. Therefore, changing your beliefs can change your life ... They are the values ​​on which we have unconsciously or consciously decided to live our life.
As a conclusion, we can affirm that if we introduce compassion and self-compassion in our values, we will activate the welfare system. We will have more joy and calm. It will help us to face our failures, to take risks, to practice and manage our competitive failures, to handle criticism and conflict, to create better and more harmonious relationships. It can become the centre of our identity if we find in it the meaning of our life.

Carmen Martinez - Psicóloga y Coaching

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Celia Martínez Psicóloga
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